The Gospel according to millennial #mombrain
Call it ADHD if you want, it’s still just another reason why we need a Savior
Hello, my dear friends,
If you follow me on Instagram you’ve probably seen me brain-dumping quite a few thoughts on that looming problem of “getting things done” that hangs over the head of so many homemakers over the last few weeks.
Like so many women my age, I appear to struggle with near-crippling ADHD that makes things like consistently completing everyday tasks, making phone calls, and remembering things to be such an overwhelming challenge.
That is, if I were to diagnose myself using shockingly relatable ADHD reels on Instagram, at least. Which I cannot ethically recommend anyone do, technically speaking.
Now, I’m a bit of a medical Luddite and quite seriously entertain the theory that we were much better off in the days long before any such diagnosis existed — it wasn’t long ago that western medicine actually viewed the spirit, mind, and body as one holistic organism as opposed to the machine it’s treated like nowadays…but alas, I sorely digress.
I suppose that’s just the suspected ADHD doing its thing.
Anywho, it’s enough for me to simply know that I have my strengths and I have my weaknesses, and laziness, foolishness, and disorganization in the daily execution of my tasks have long been a seemingly insurmountable weakness of mine. And the inception of classic millennial “mom brain” has certainly exacerbated and forced me to closely examine all of these tendencies.
Now, I do think there can be a lot of value to modern psychology as it is based in part on observations of the very real, complex fallen human minds, among whom there are many consistent trends. This is, of course, because our minds all have the same designer and same spiritual condition in this great cosmic drama we are engaged in.
However, as fascinating as these things are to ponder and discuss (and I do hope you will share your thoughts in the comments), I am content to see my challenges as a homemaker as a mere spiritual ones.
Last week I did a deep dive study into Proverbs 14:1 (I was trying verse mapping for the first time, and in the interest of not getting distracted again I will simply tell you that I’m a huge fan).
I have since been meditating on its painfully applicable wisdom for homemakers and just how far-reaching is application really is to the whole of our spiritual experiences as women of God, wives, and mothers.
This timeless warning urges us to consider that “the wise woman builds up her house, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands.”
The word used for “wise” seemed to denote one who is diligent, orderly, and fears the Lord.
And the word for “foolish” denotes not, as I’d assumed, someone who is unintelligent, but who resents authority, does not fear God, and is contentions, quarrelsome, and licentious. She’s not just disorganized and silly. In her heart of hearts, she resents God’s wisdom, rebels against diligence and consistency, and likely fights against the expectation that she strive for such virtues rather than be driven by her own self-centered desires.
Ouch.
Now, let me take the opportunity to clarify boldly that I am not using this to say that what we call “ADHD” is really just destructive wickedness.
What I am saying is that self-centered, disordered wickedness is the core heart condition of every single human being, spazzy homemakers included.
Things like my lifelong habits of avoidance, procrastination, overthinking, and unreliability, no matter how easy they are to explain from an earthly, psychological standpoint, are still ultimately rooted in my fallen state.
And if I’m being honest with myself, I see clearly that they are most often based in disordered thoughts that place me at the center of my universe instead of God.
If I put off doing pressing tasks because I’m so cozy in bed, comfortable on the couch, or distracted by the time-sucking allure of Instagram, I’m ultimately being driven by my desires as I choose to heed what I “feel like” over the timeless proverbial wisdom of scripture that tells me to avoid acting upon laziness.
We don’t apply the Bible to our lives in a works-based attempt to become “good Christians.” We apply the Bible to our lives because, like its many admonishments to work diligently so as to enjoy the product of hard work rather than languish away due to ill-sighted laziness, we know that God’s wisdom for us is always better than any flesh-based desire to satisfy ourselves.
I can blame ADHD, blue light on my phone, modern food production methods, or whatever I want, when my thoughts are not ordered according to the hierarchy of the cosmos at which our Lord Jesus Christ is at the apex, I am not behaving wisely.
The same is true for when I am avoiding a task over anxiety or feeling overwhelmed because I have mismanaged my time.
When I fear man’s regard for me over my Christ-oriented duties — people-pleasing tendencies can be a common dynamic that is often at play with overly packed schedules and constant flakiness — I am making foolish choices that hurt the people I’m trying to please and myself.
When we are driven by our love of self, disordered regard for objects in creation, or an inflated sense of importance attributed to others’ opinions of us, we are not being motivated by a fear of the Lord.
Psychological or cerebral explanations for what is at work behind these thought patterns and the fruit they bear in our life are not wholly useless; they can be insightful and helpful.
Yet for those who hold and live according to the mature Christian worldview, God’s Word is sufficient to aid us address these harmful patterns of self-sabotage that needed no psychological diagnosis to identify.
So, keep forging ahead in the fear of the Lord, submitting your thoughts to Him, growing in Him, clinging to Him in your failures, repenting of your disoriented thoughts and feelings, and constantly falling deeper in love with His salvation and plan for our life.
This will be a lifelong process of daily practicing diligence and soundly applying our priceless biblical wisdom, in all our triumphs and insufficiencies.
Keeping up your stamina as you run the race towards the finish line of Christ, when we will finally lay down our earthly weapons and live in glory, is worth more than all the diagnosis and life hacks in the world.
I agree with this so much. I think we really want to have a reason or excuse for our selfishness or laziness. I fought myself with this all day today. But at the end. No matter what "good reasons" I could have possibly come up with, I just needed to swallow my pride, repent, and change directions. It isn't pretty, but it's true.
This is it! Love the truth and perspective here- wise words Isa!